mainstream psychology

First, thank you to all of you for your comments and support on my posts. I really appreciate it more than I can say. I don't know where I'd be without you all. I'm really relieved, and feel slightly less like an idiot, that you all think it's odd my friend forgot her due date. I was shocked, and subsequently, felt pretty isolated here in Dead Baby Land. Glad to know I have some company here (even though I wish none of you had to be here). On with today's thoughts...

I love my PVR. It's the best thing I own. I love that I can scroll through the guide and select things to record, have it remember for me without me having to actually do anything, and then, when I'm ready, I can watch it and fast forward the commercials.

In accordance with my current weight loss journey (which is going ok), I record anything and everything regarding weight loss. Someone told me that dr p.hil was doing a weight loss series on Wednesdays, so I set the PVR to record on Wednesdays. Well, it must not be every Wednesday because I sat down yesterday morning to watch what I've recorded. It had nothing to do with weight loss; in fact, the daily topic was suicide.

Charlotte's death has not made me suicidal. There have been, however (no one panic, please), particularly dark days and nights where I wanted to die. I do think there's a big difference between wanting to die and being suicidal. Ultimately, though, I can somewhat understand why people do commit suicide. I can imagine being in a hole so deep you can't see a way out. I empathize with that. If nothing else, Charlotte's death has made me more compassionate.

I had a roommate in college that was depressed, and she contemplated suicide (she's happy and healthy now, doing great). At the time, I remember wondering how anyone could ever consider that. All I could see was this 20-year old with her life ahead of her, all the wonderful things that could come her way. My perspective has changed. I can think back now and understand her despair.

So, anyway, back to the show.

He profiled one couple who's seemingly perky 17-year old daughter jumped off a bridge. The couple, understandably, was devasated, and it was complicated by the fact that they blamed themselves, as their daughter's death followed a family argument. The poor mother was a shell, and I could imagine her pain. The father was similar.

What surprised me? Dr p.hil.

He basically sat there and dished out so many of the common "feel better" phrases that no one wants to hear. You had her for seventeen years... etc. Then he looked at them and said, You can't let this ruin three lives instead of one.

The father looked up, incredulous, and spoke: But it already has ruined three lives.

I just couldn't believe dr p.hil said that. I really couldn't. I know what he was getting at. I know that we all have to move on. But still. They lost their only child. How are they supposed to move on? Where are they supposed to go? I can't get my head around this.

I neither loathe nor love dr p.hil. My mother adores his show, and I usually watch it with her when I'm visiting. I've never related to an episode like this before. Now that I had a different perspective, it was pretty crappy advice. I'd love to hear what he would have to say to us. I'd probably want to hit him.

Anyone else see it? Thoughts?