I was in the hospital all week. Admitted on Monday with a bp of 154/112, we thought that was it, that Bee would be coming very very soon. They doped me up with more medications and drew labs and said we would "wait and see". I stabilized and then on Thursday was sent home. I was home long enough to read a couple of blogs and leave a couple of comments, and then on Friday the BP spiked again and I was back in the hospital. Discharged again late yesterday, only because my home care nurses are great, and I live 5 mins away should I get any of the other symptoms I'm always told to watch for.
My platelets are on the decline. They're not dangerously low yet, but they're definitely getting lower. All a sign of impending HELLP. I have a feeling that regardless of the amnio result on Thursday (if I make it to Thursday), that bebe is coming out this week. My obgyn is at a conference and will be back on Wednesday, and since she's been gone the covering doctors have handled me carefully. My history is "huge", they say. At any rate, I'm looking forward to having my own doctor back.
Bumblebee is a little trooper though. It amazes me that he can grow and thrive in a body with blood pressures like that. He must be a strong little guy.
My goal is to deliver this baby without getting really sick, without having to be on mag sulfate, without having to have 24 hour nurses for days on end. I'd like to be up and about from the surgery the normal 12 hours later, instead of 3 days later. I'd like to have the strength to hold my baby. I'd like to remember it instead of the medicated fog. I'd like to be on the maternity floor, where I have been so many times pregnant, with a baby in a bassinet next to my bed.
So, I think as soon as my platelets crash further or as soon as I show other symptoms or as soon as I hit 36 weeks (on Thursday) then he should come out. My doctors agree.
I can't help it, I'm excited. Despite the potential medical complications for me, I am very excited to meet this little guy, see who he looks like, if he has any hair. I want to hear him cry. I want to try breastfeeding him. I have a little sleeper I want him to wear right away. Some of this sounds so normal I don't even recognize myself. I really, really, hope that he comes out screaming and is ok. I can handle some NICU time if necessary, but I need this baby to come home. If he doesn't, if something happens and he doesn't make it, then, well, I just don't know.
But I'm trying to be positive, and be excited. The carseat is installed. Bumblebee's hospital bag is packed. Bassinet is ready.
I hope it all doesn't blow up in my face.
(My apologies if I am behind on your blog. I'll try to catch up soon.)
17 comments:
Hang in there both of you! You are in my thoughts and prayers
xoxo
So glad to see you posting. Thinking of you and Bee.
Very exciting. Sorry about your BP.
Can't wait to meet him. I will pray for his arrival to be perfect in everyway! God Bless.
Oy vey. So glad you are getting taken care of so well. 36 weeks sounds perfect.
You sound great -- hoping you and Bee continue to be safe.
Thinking of you!
You have been through so much, I can't wait for him to be here as well. I will be sending good thoughts and prayers that everything goes exactly the way you want and need it to happen.
Hang in there...you are doing an amazing job!
Don't apologise! Just keep taking care of yourself and Bee. I was thinking of you yesterday as I did some washing for this baby boy and one of the little t-shirts that would have been Hope's has a bumblebee on it. I'll think of you both when he hopefully wears it on the outside.
Update when you can!
Hmm sounds like we have had a similar week to each other. Hang in there. We can make it. We just have to get through a few more days.
xx
I'm sorry you're having so much trouble - but I'm very, very glad that bumble bee is still doing great! I hope you have a better week this week than you did last week. Keep us updated!
How exciting! I hope everything goes well for you guys. I can't believe it is almost here!
I hope this will be reassuring. When the symptoms of hellp kicked in for me, I really knew it and there was still a few days between that and delivery.
So glad that Bee is doing so well and that you're being taken care of. Hoping really hard for a safe delivery.
Hoping SO hard right along with you - you don't even know ;) I want you to meet this little guy, to be able to hold him right away and dress him in his little sleeper, and bring him home to his bassinet. I am so hopeful for you.
I understand being scared of getting so sick - even if everything ends up "okay" in the long run, it's certainly not an ideal beginning. I'm thrilled that you're even far enough along to be having these thoughts! And I will keep everything crossed that you both hang in there until Thursday when you get to meet your little man.
((Hugs)) honey.
hang in there! bumblebee will be with you soon and you will be taking him home!
Holding my breath for you!
Darn BP!
It's been a few days since this post, so I am wondering if the baby is here already???!???
I'll be thinking of you this week.
Hang in there, Heather!! Stay safe, both of you! Will be waiting to hear how you're both doing!
Thinking of all you and sending, as always happy, healthy, baby vibes and momma vibes.
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