Wedding Day

I sit here with two hours to go before I head to this wedding. I just got back from the hairdresser, and my hair is fabulous. I usually don't care too much about such things, but damn it, if I may be in for a torturous day surrounded by babies and friends who ignore us, I'm going to do it with fabulous hair.

I'm probably being way too harsh. This wedding could end up being tons of fun. We'll see; I hope so.

I finished up my first week of classes. I am somewhat organized. Forgetful, yes. But the materials themselves have finally started to make sense, and the class is small this year, making names and faces easier to remember. A dear dear friend from undergrad is home from an almost-completed PhD, and is also doing some adjunct teaching. It was absolutely wonderful to have an old, pre-baby friend to spend time with. It's been years since I've seen him, but this week was great. I'm really glad to have a buddy on campus this year.

All in all, this weekend is turning out to be busy, over-stimulating. The wedding today. Tonight my parents show up to spend the weekend, tomorrow I'm organist at another wedding and a funeral. The funeral will be my first since Charlotte's. I don't know the family, and the service is very standard, so I'm hoping I will get through unscathed. I'll be relieved on Sunday when everything calms down. I'm not much for busyness nowadays.

M came home last night sad and defeated. He had accompanied his parents to the wake of long-time neighbour who had passed away. What he did not know was that it was at the same funeral home where Charlotte's service was, and when he got there, it was in the same room. He found that really hard. I could only stay 5 minutes, he said. I had to get out of there.

I know the feeling, all too well.

I have officially lost the week count since Charlotte. For months, every Friday I would relive that day hour by hour, thinking ten weeks ago right now...., sixteen weeks ago, etc. I lost count a couple of weeks ago, and I was glad. I'm counting months now, which is slightly less neurotic and a little more manageable. It was 5 months yesterday. I'm dreading six.

Any progress is good, I figure. I count "losing the count" as progress.

My hair and I are in for an interesting day. I will report later.